Bicycling

Ray and I bought 10 speed Fuji bikes in 1982 in New York. I think they cost $250 a piece at the time,and they were top line. We rode them all over the city for the three years before Joseph was born. In fact, when Ray graduated from medical school our big trip was a 250 mile trip through northern westchester, putnam and conneticut on the bikes. We stayed in the cheapest hotels, and bbqd our dinners. It was alot of fun, but I had sore legs for weeks afterwards - there are some very steep hills in westchester, putnam and conneticut!

When Joe was 12 Christine and Ric told us about the first bike ride across the Tappan Zee bridge. I can't remember why I got to go with them, but I signed Joe and I up. It was a relatively short trip, but very beautiful, across the bridge. And we raised some money for a charitable organization, it was our first long bike trip.

Today is the 5 boro bike tour in NY. After the first trip across the Tappan Zee, Ray took Daniel and Joe on the 40 mile bike tours. For the next five or six years, it was an annual Chow event to go on the tour. It got easier and easier as we got to be better bikers, but still always a great way to see the city.

Piano Music

Next week we go to Africa. We are preparing a time capsule to leave at the site of Joe's last hike.

Today I am going through his ipod, preparing a disc of Joseph's favorite pieces. I am putting the Bach organ pieces that Joseph played, and he had made a disc for us for Christmas 2006. Also, Beethoven Sonata No. 8, Glen Gould playing Bach: Well Tempered Clavier; Chopin Piano Concerto No. 1; The Goldberg Variations; all music that Joseph loved. I am putting George Winston's "Winter into Spring". During Joseph's first year we would play George Winston over and over, because it would soothe him. He always loved the piano!

Obama's Birth Certificate

Today, President Obama had to stand up before the press (and the country) and present the long form of his birth certificate. How ridiculous is that! It is outrageous that a bonafide citizen of the US has to provide to the world further proof of citizenship. His mom was American, he was raised by his mom; but that is not good enough because he looks like a black man and he was born in Hawaii (almost Indonesia to the ignorant among us.)

I would never of done what his mom did; marry a foreigner and move to Indonesia - but she ( Obama's mom) must have been very brave. And his grandparents were salt of the earth. They took over when it became apparant that their daughter was never going to return to the stable lifestyle of raising children. They made sure the children were raised with good family values, and an excellent education. I am sure his mom loved him, but the grandparents were a very stable world for him.

Joseph's great uncle, Sun Yat Sen, went to the same Haiwaiian school as Obama. I think many other members of the family went to the school (there was alot of movement between Hawaii and China at the turn of the 20th century). Joseph was born in NY to a Chinese immigrants' son and an "Irish-American" mom (event though the family can join the DAR). The whole race issue, and proof of how "American" you are is ridiculous. Obama's mom was obviously American, and raised her son with American values - or how else would he have aspired to be the president of the United States?

Easter

Yesterday, we had the family for a holiday celebration. The first holiday meal that we have cooked since September 2009. Only 14 people, some are sick, some are out of town, but the table was crowded, there was abundant food and the noise was constant. It was a good day, except the part where we had to visit Joe's grave. Daniel and Kyle were both here, and I do love having the boys here. Being a mom is different than any other role a human plays. It is the most basic role an animal plays; nurturer, protector, teacher and everything else. Mom's are all things to the child; until the child grows. But the child remains all things to the mom; that never changes.

I have just finished a book "The War that Killed Achilles: The True Story of Homer's Illiad." I have read and reread the Illiad, and did not understand it until now. It is an anti-war story, an anti-government story, a story of emotions and teams that do not always pull together. The humans tempt the fates and try to bribe the gods, and fate and the gods always win. The mom (Thetis), knows from before his conception that son (Achilles) is going to die young; yet she returns to Zeus and begs for his life, his easy death or anything else she can get out of the gods. In the end, the fates win and Achilles dies, as was foreordained. Mothers have no say in the matter, life goes on; children go to battle, go for adventures live there lives as they see fit. The mortals have to hope that they have taught their children in the childhood years all that needs to be known. The childhood years just seem to short for all that needs to be taught. Then again, maybe we did not know all that needed to be taught.

Passover/Easter

This week is Passover and Easter. Passover ... what a great holiday! It is about food, history, a smattering of religion, family and friends. What can get better! Since we have been involved in Edgemont we have gone to at least one seder a year. This year it was two! You get invited, hang out around a dinner table, eat the proscribed foods, drink wine and talk about life and family and values. Everyone is included, and the youngest at the table is even celebrated. The Jewish culture has it right!

The problem comes with all the memories. I remember sitting around the same table, being so proud of my children because of how well they were read; how well they understood the bible stories (ccd and Fordham, and basic love of story telling) and how much they like listening to other people around a dinner talbe. I really have great boys.

When Joseph was 17 Passover came just when he had to invite a girl to the prom. His Fordham Prep friends insisted that he have a date and they had someone in mind; Joe had someone from his swim team in mind. But it took him alot of nerve to build up the nerve to ask the girl. Finally, he had to buy the ticket, and it was Passover dinner. We went to our friends seder; and they knew that this was Joe's last night to call the girl before his friends stepped in and found him a date. We showed up for the seder, he insisted that he would call that evening before nine. Everyone sat around the dinner table looking at Joe, waiting for him to make the phone call. Then he excused himself to go upstairs where he could privately make the phone call. Then we all waited at the table .... and we waited and waited. Finally after about 45 minutes of a very slow seder the hostess went to find Joseph. He was up in the master bedroom hanging out on the bed watching t.v. He had called the girl 45 minutes beforehand, asked her to the prom, she said yes.... and there was a good movie on t.v. that he wanted to watch. What a teenager!

The American Civil War 150th anniversary

Today is the 150th anniversary of the start of the American Civil War. I heard on the news yesterday that only 17 million Americans have family that fought in the Civil War. That is about 5% of the US population, which I find amazing. Although our family is an immigrant family (and we trace one branch back to the Mayflower), we had several great-great relatives who fought in the Civil War.

My Dada was 94 when he died in 1963. One of my earliest memories is of sitting on Dada's lap, smelling the pipe smoke and feeling like all was safe in the world. Dada was Walter Bennett (http://www.konvalinka.com.benhome.htm/). His Dad was Michael Bennett, who immigrated from Ireland in the 1830's and raised a regiment for the Civil War. Michael must of been quite some guy; fell off his horse and broke his leg on the way out of Brooklyn whilst leading his regiment to war. He did eventually make it to the War.

The Robertsons also sent some of their sons to the War. None of them died, but I don't think they had happy memories of the war. The library in Leyden Massachussettes was the result of one of the boys refusing the government pension for participation in the Civil War. When the Robertson's were young men (17 - 21), they joined a regiment that ended up in Louisiana, not a happy place to be.

When Joseph left for college, I could not sleep. I was so worried about him I would wake up at 3 am and not fall back to sleep. I kept telling myself this was a ridiculous emotional reaction. When his great-great uncles and grandfathers were his age (and in the 1860's) they were off fighting battles and in the malarial swamps of Louisiana; they managed to make it home. Being sent off to Amherst College was a picnic compared to that experience. And then Joseph decided to go to Africa!

The picture is: 1. The Robertson Library in Leyden Mass. and 2. The Mbinga Library in Tanzania that has the reading room named in honor of Joseph Lawrence Chow.

It takes a village

Hynek, our last au pair, came to the US last week and stayed with us. Hynek first came to us in March of 2001, and then he stayed in the US for several years learning how to teach. He is back in the Czech Republic now teaching. Before Hynek, Oz from Germany was with us, before that was Elian from France and before that we had Julia from Sweden. They all came to the US to learn English, and stay in the states for an extended visit. The boys learned how to interact with people who were learning how to speak English (very slowly), and about different cultures, and also many useful household repairs, like breaking broken windows and repairing holes in the wall (before Mom and Dad got home!). They also got driving lessons as they got older! They were so lucky to have these great kids come and teach them for a year at a time. The house could be a little wild, but there was alot of energy and fun. The au pair experience was great for us. Before we had au pairs we had Jennifer and Christine, two neighborhood girls who loved my boys. They were our babysitters and summer helpers when the boys were little. They have kids of their own now, and we still visit and go to significant family events. They loved the boys and also brought a lot of energy and and fun to the house.