Two years of Joseph in Africa

Part of the whole loss issue is the fact that Joseph was not at home for the last two years. He was a young man, and he was serving his country, so it was not unusual he was not at home. But to go away for two years (3 months) was a long time to leave home. Joseph thought so too. He was only going to apply to medical school in NY city and Westchester.

Luckily, we got to spend some quality time with Joseph in the last two years. In September 2008 Joseph was supposed to go to London to visit his girlfriend. Llana is an investment banker and had been working for Lehman Brothers. After a year in Africa, Joseph was not sympathetic to the consumer US society (still very idealistic). Unfortunately, Joseph showed up in London the week that Lehman's Brothers went bankrupt; and I doubt he had much sympathy for the investment bankers. Anyway, we got a call late on a Friday saying that he and Llana were splitting up, could he come home for 2 weeks. Two days later he was home, and we spent a week and a half together. Joseph got to visit his friends in NY, and then we drove up to Amherst to see Daniel play rugby. The next weekend we drove up to Middlebury so Joe could spend some time with Daniel, we played some golf. Then we did an incredibly long drive down to see Kyle at Georgetown. Something like a 12 hour drive thru upstate NY, Pennsylvania, Maryland and DC. It gives fond memories.

We had said we would visit Joe in Africa, so in January 2009 we started the trip. It was perfect, Kyle could go before he started work for the summer, and we could leave the day after Daniel's graduation. We got to spend three great weeks with Joseph - when I came home, I was so happy. Tanzania was a great place to visit; the Serengetti was amazing and we spent all that time together as a family. What memories.

The other way we stayed in touch, especially the first year was through mail and packages. Every week I wrote Joseph a letter for the first year - when he had no internet. Then, we wrote emails. The packages were from all the Aunt's and Uncle's and family and friends. Joseph knew he was missed, and he had enough to read. Every Sunday for the entire two years I would call at 1 pm on Sunday. Every Sunday, most of them we would talk for an hour. He was lonely, and he liked the phone calls. He was always there to pick them up. The first few weeks after the accident the hardest part of the week was 1 pm on Sunday. It had become a habit.