Wedding

Yesterday we went to the wedding of Julia and Adam. Adam was among Joe's best friends at Amherst. Adam grew up in Westchester and knew two of Joe's cousins in high school. He also swam in Westchester and actually been recruited to swim at Amherst; Joe was a walk on.

The first day of freshman orientation at Amherst Joseph and I were sitting in the local bank waiting to set up an account. Joe was 17 so he needed me to sign off on everything. We happened to sit down directly across from Adam, who looked up at us and said "Hey, you must be Joe Chow!" -and luckily for him it was Joe Chow. From then on Joe and Adam spent alot of time together, and I am sure did alot of talking together. Adam was a Physics major, Joe a chem major. They both swam and played water polo. Two of a kind.

Yesterday, we attended Adam's wedding to Julia. Last year when Adam and Julia became engaged, Joseph called us - he was so excited that one of his friends was actually taking the leap into adulthood! And, Adam had asked Joseph to be a Chupah bearer and Joe had no idea what that entailed! He was so honored to be asked to be in the wedding party. Also, Joseph had had a lot of time to think about relationships and love, and determined that Adam and Julia had a great relationship, and it was something that he should aspire to - if only he could figure out how to start on one! (he was always one to think of the mind over emotions).

Yesterday, Ray and I sat in Glen Island in Joe's place and I have to say it was possibly one of the hardest days of my life. It was a beautiful day, the wedding ceremony was beautiful, and the party following was wonderful. But to be there without my boy is nearly impossible, he should have been there,not us. All of his friends are doing well, and we spent some time talking with all of them. There is the uncertainty of being that age - but what they should take home from Joe is that life is short, enjoy the here and now, because plans do not always come to fruition.